Is it truly possible? Can a Type A Personality actually be a Procrastinator? Or is it possible one could presume if the individual had involved, purposely or not, enough added circumstances or situations it could adversely affect one personality trait with another?
First, I would like to apologize for the erratic posting. As I’ve been a bit under the weather with this horrible cold on top of everything else, I’ve had plenty of thoughts on what to post about, but had such brain fog, couldn’t put the words down correctly. Prayerfully, this post won’t disappoint. 🙂
I have always been organized. Whether it’s a possible increase or growth of brain lesions or not, I have been completely bat brained lately. I can’t remember sometimes the most simplest of things, something that is a known result of the lesions due to their location on my brain. I have always been huge on routine, since a younge age which has been my way of having some type of control on what seemed a beyond out of control life.
For probably the past year though, I have been the worst Type A personality out there. I want to be in control, yet by procrastinating, while I’m being in control of my own actions, I’m not in control of when certain tasks are in need of completion. Of course, this typically happens only when it comes to paperwork, or online version thereof. However, once I have finally removed myself from that mode of delay, I find I’m beyond productive; it’s just a matter of getting to that point.
Unfortunately, over the past many months, with all the many different stressors along with the effect they have on my illnesses, procrastination has been more of a savior than not.
Retention has also been quite problematic. I am so far behind on weekly sermons due to slight agoraphobia coupled with having this horrible lung issue causing me to cough in bark-like sounding fits that are frequent and prevents regular church attendance. This, along with the retention issues have also made it difficult to view sermons online.
But alas, these are all excuses in His eyes. There is no reason whatsoever why I should continue to put myself and my earthly problems and desires above Him and my love for Him. He has always shown me love, protection, guidance, and provision. He never fails me and never will.
The problem with everything is me though. Not personally or physically, but mentally and spiritually. I allow myself to take my time away from being in relationship with God and learning more about Him and put useless distractions in those very times I had for Him. Soon enough, I began to be too busy, or too tired, or too sick, or too something, for making Him my priority as He did for me when He took my sins from me and was crucified on the cross. The amount of grace, forgiveness, and love, all of which I am quite undeserving of, but He so willingly and freely gave up the Life of His only Son, Jesus Christ, which should be out of reach, He gives to each and every one of us.
I hear the phrase God works in Mysterious Ways! more often than not. But I would like to posit His ways are truly not that mysterious if we are aware and conscience of all He truly is. This was just shown to me as I have been typing this and missing His community and ministry, a very dear Sister in Christ and Proverbs 31 Woman telephoned. He truly works in ways to make all things good for us as is promised in Jeremiah 29:11. She offered her assistance in any way to help as she understands the difficult season I am in and genuinely inquired how I was feeling…not just physically, but spiritually. Her call truly was sent to me by Him and I am beyond grateful. One of the best parts of our conversation was when she prayed for me.
Truly, I have never met a person who didn’t want to receive a prayer or two, or more. 😉 I’ve been blessed to have been prayed on by many different people and many different ways and types of prayer. Some were very simplistic, but to the point and clear. Others were lengthy and elaborate. There were also prayers which were a combination of things. But each prayer was said with love and faith they were already answered.
I suppose I could take a few lessons from my own post.
1 – Procrastination while Type A is possible, though essentially, not recommended.
2- While it is sometimes okay to escape in your head, it is not suggested to remain there for any length of time. The longer one remains detached from reality, the more difficult it can become to acclimate to life again once returned.
3 – While completely undeserving of eternal grace and forgiveness, if one is truly grateful and thankful for such a Gift, they should put Him as the highest priority in their life and always give thanks.
4 – God already knows what is needed. He always provides. While it is necessary to have that faith, He also expects for us to give our 100% as well. We are not to be idle.
Be blessed. Love lots. Give graciously.